stardustcboy's Diaryland Diary

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The Story of Little Sancho - Chapter 4: The man, his salvation and his final lesson.

Do not read this until you have read

Chapter 1

And

Chapter 2

And

Chapter 3

THE STORY OF LITTLE SANCHO � CHAPTER 4: The man, his salvation, and his final lesson.

the day at the gravestones was not the last for little Sancho, for he had many a demon to vanquish before he could be at peace. All his life he had run, as many of us do, from the sorrows that plagued him�to forget. But life has its way with us all, and the more we run, the more we struggle against the past that has shaped us, the more painful life becomes�
so it was that two years ago little Sancho was forced by the hands of fate, to face the last of his demons. It came suddenly, on an ordinary day much like today. Sancho had just put in for retirement and was preparing for his last year of teaching. It was graduation day, and he had gone to a grocery store to buy cards for his students (as he always did at the end of each year). He had just moved into a condo with his wife and it was his first time visiting this particular store, so Sancho did not know his way around. As is common with many of his age, not knowing ones surroundings can lead to a certain amount of disorientation. So Sancho wandered the store, buying milk and other common things, before finding the cards. There was a woman in front of him and he could not see around her to get the cards. Deciding to finish his shopping and let her look more, Sancho wandered more and picked up the last of his items. When he returned to the cards the woman was still there; and when he leaned in closer to look the police appeared as from nowhere and took him away.
This was a very difficult time for Sancho. For the store was pressing charges for sexual assault. The owner�s said that he was molesting the woman at the card stand and that he was generally being a nuisance to the customers.
So it was that Sancho lost his job as a teacher, for such charges are not taken lightly, and so too did Sancho lose his wife, for she could not bear the idea that her husband was a sick pervert. As is the way with such things, all of Sancho�s life was under intense scrutiny. He was psychologically evaluated, poked and prodded and all of his past was brought to life before the judge and the jury and the prosecution. He had to tell of his victimization as a child, of the nights in the basement. He had to tell of all the times he visited a sex store or a strip club, and all of it was cast in the deepest of shadow and doubt.
This was not a good time for Sancho, for it forced him to face the pain of all his long years, forced him to confront the darkest scars upon his spirit, and the greatest of woes of his life. It was not easy, for Sancho was now alone. His wife was gone, God had forsaken him; and he slowly brought the gun to his head�
But alas, I was there for Sancho. I came to him near the end of the summer two years ago to council and protect him. I held him in my arms and told him that all would be well in the end. I took the gun to the pawn shop and sold it so that he would not harm himself, and I sat with him on the porch and talked to him of good days and good times.
He would say to me�

�all would be better if I just ended it here. Life is worthless, I am worthless, I have done nothing, achieved nothing. dying would be the only thing that makes it all better. Then there would be no more pain and people could live on without me. I am not strong enough. I cannot live any longer. My wife has left me and I am forsaken without her. If only I could die and never again feel what I feel at this moment.�

To which I replied�

�dearest Sancho, I have learned a great deal from you. Of all the things I have learned, it is that despite what happens in our lives, we must face it with strength and faith. You have taught me, my beloved Sancho, that it is only the weak who lay down and die in the face of aridity and aversion. Look! Look, little Sancho! How far you have come! How can you say you have achieved nothing? how can you say you are nothing? these words! They are a tragedy falling from you lips Sancho! Do not back out on me now! For you would go against all that you have taught, and you would be but a lying, weak hypocrit. You life, little Sancho, is a story that is told by those whom survive you when you are gone. What kind of story do you want your life to be? Ask yourself. Do you want your story to be a tragedy, a sorrowful tale of a man beset by woe, only to succumb and be devoured? Or do you want your story to be a story of heroism, of hardships overcome, of love lost and love won. Ask yourself little Sancho, ask yourself, are you a tragic fool or a great hero? Have you inspired those you have known and loved? Or have you left them with nothing but bitterness and regret and sorrow? You must have FAITH little Sancho, FAITH that the universe, that GOD has a greater plan for you�for us all. You must have FAITH that all of this has its purpose in the great scheme of all things and that in the end, your story will be as YOU make it. FAITH Sancho, is all that we have, and HOPE is all that we can cling to when the times are dark and we are but lost on the seas of the cosmos. THAT my dear Sancho, is what YOU HAVE TAUGHT ME. So listen to your words now, find strength in me, find faith in God and all will be as it should.�

That is what I said unto him, word for word�
So Sancho did as I had said. He went to his priest, for the first time since he was a boy, and poured all the long years of his life out before him. He sought God�s forgiveness and his compassion and his mercy and he was answered. Whether it be in his heart, or his mind, or his soul, little Sancho found salvation. He was re-galvanized, and he faced his pain and his fear with an open heart and an open mind.
Sancho and his wife Christa renewed their vows on February 14th, 2002. this time it was a BIG ceremony. Though Christa�s mother could not be there, her father was and all was a celebration.
Sancho still had to go to court, he still had to deal with all the things that had happened.
After many an ardous journey little Sancho is a man�or maybe�maybe he is something more now? I still talk to Sancho. He called me on the phone this morning. He said between sobs�

�Son�I wanted to call and tell you. I went to court today and they said that I wasn�t guilty of sexual assault. They made me plea guilty to harassment, but it was just a fine of $750 dollars. I�m free son. I�m free. I wanted to call and tell you. You have been there son, for me, when all was lost. I couldn�t have done it without your strength and support son. You showed me, you showed me my faith, you showed me that everything does indeed happen for a reason, and that God is always with us. Thank you son. Thank you.�

To which I tearily replied�

�Father�Dad�I�I am merely giving back to you, all that you have given me in all the years of my life. THANK YOU Dad. I love you.�

Such is the story of little Sancho�my father�my hero�my idol. He has taught me many a great thing, and his life is testimony to the strength and light of the human spirit. Perhaps we all could learn something from the story of little Sancho. I know for a fact that I have.

I have learned that life is what we make of it.
I have learned that despite our hardships and our sorrow, we can still become amazing people�more than that�we can become�well�saints I guess. People, no children, of God and the great cosmos.
I have learned that we CAN touch people in our lives, show them how to be better and grow.
I have learned that in many ways, there IS a God, we may not be able to agree with what IT is exactly, but it IS there and it DOES guide us in some way.

If this story were never to have happened, then I, your dear narrator, would have never happened; and moreover, I would not be here to tell the story of little Sancho, and recount to you the acts of heroism, bravery and strength of a man beset by tragedy and loss. I would not be able to tell you that HIS story does indeed have a happy ending; and he will be at peace and TRULY live�

HAPPILY EVER AFTER.

Amen.

My heart is full.
~B-)

1:26 p.m. - 2004-10-16

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