stardustcboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ...911... i awoke that morning from a dream... i had dreamt i had surfaced from underground with my cousin. above us the sky was on fire and turned to him and said... "we better run!" the alarm went off and i rubbed the sleep from my eyes. i did my regular morning routine...shower, shave, brush teeth, get dressed, feed the cat, lock the door, get in car, drive to work... as i was leaving the my home phone rang. assuming it was some creditor i let the answering machine get it and raced out the door. all the way to work i listened to RadioHead "Kid A" CD...my only clue that something was amiss was the preternatural serenity and emptiness of the freeway, and the line of police cruisers that had closed the freeway exit to LAX. when i finally got to work everyone informed me of the calamity. by that time all the planes had hit their intended targets or crashed and the WTC was falling. they watched, listened to the television and the radio and the internet. the images flashing... i called my home phone and remotely checked my messages... "son! it's your father! turn on the TV. a plane has crashed into the world trade center...they don't know if it's an accident or what but we've tried calling your cousin and aunt. they were supposed to be there today! we haven't been able to reach them and we're praying for their safety...call us when you get this..." i was shocked. the very same cousin (the CuZ from the previous and following veGas entries) worked at the WTC. at first i was horrified, but the memory of the dream resurfaced and i was suddenly at ease. i picked up my cell phone...selected the CuZ from my phone list and dialed... "hey, this is Shea...i can't answer now, but leave a message and i'll get back to you..." *beep* i was astonished, exasperated...i had gotten through to his voicemail by some miracle of fate... "Shea...hermano...i don't know where you are or what you are doing, but i don't feel that you have gone. whatever the case may be...know that i am with you...my strength is yours...i love you." ...and that was it. i called my dad and told him i got through to the voicemail. him and my mother were both afraid that my cousin and my aunt were lost. i told them my heart did not feel that they had gone from this world...that they were still here. a few days later the CuZ called. he was crying. he said when he came out of the subway he saw the first plane hit directly above him...he was so frightened he ran and ran and ran and ran...so long and so far he had gotten lost in NYC. he said he tried calling his mother, his sister, his dad...but his cell phone wasn't getting through to them. he checked his voicemail and the one singular message spoke to him across the void of digital/space/time...my voice...my words... he said just that small message made it all okay...and he was thankful he had survived it to hear my voice... so in memory of that day...and in particular... ...in memory of all the people who DIDN'T survive to hear the voices of their loved ones, calling across the distances... ...and in memory of those who survived the loss of family and friends whom they couldn't speak to, couldn't reach, couldn't help... ...my they all live on in memory and in dreams and in the light of the grand and divine cosmos forever and ever... amen. ~B-) 10:18 a.m. - 2003-09-11 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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