stardustcboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ...Return from the touchstone... ah colorado... it was good to get home. i've found that everyone is in the same fix this year as far as gift-giving is concerned... the economy is in the shithole. but you know what?...who fucking cares? does it REALLY matter if you get someone a gift? i mean, these are such trivialities...based entirely off of the capitolist materilist machine...ever so hungry to devour the masses of consumers born and bred to buy, buy, buy... not me. fuck the bozos! i realized that the most important thing in life is not what you HAVE...that you are NOT defined by what you purchase...or your purchasing power...or any of that materialistic bullshit that the ads pump into our heads 24/7. no, no, no dear children...you are what you DO...what you THINK...what you BELIEVE. and above all, your life is a memory...a story told by those you leave behind...not WHAT you leave behind. i don't know how many times i have to say it...but...all your THINGS...your car...your house...your bank account...your gucci shoes...you expensive handbag...your diamond ring... they don't give a fuck about you. which is funny...because we seem to care so much about them. in the end...and yes...deal with it...there will be an END to your life (whenever however)...the only thing that truly matters is who is there to celebrate your passing...celebrate the life that came before the death. it would be such a sad story to have no mourners at my funeral...that would only tell me that i didn't live life very well...and that i didn't really touch people in a positive way. going home to those mountains...seeing my family together after 2 years...that made my christmas fantastic. and you know what? i didn't get shit. no big presents, no junk to drag home in 20 suitcases, no pretty little trinkets and nostalgic knick-knacks... what i did bring back were some really great memories of people i haven't seen in a long time. of my cousins, of my mother and father (back together at last), of my sister and her fiance, of my grandfather (who i know is not long for this world), of my uncles and aunts, my little cousins (who aren't so little anymore), and those wonderfully ancient and majestic mountains. i cherish these things above all. for these are the people in my life...and i am truly blessed. so i rejoice in what the universe has given me...good and bad...i celebrate the lives that make mine brighter...and the moments of pure happiness that are so scarce and few...and overall am glad that i have made it this far... so my vacation was good. i returned to LA for new years, so that i can celebrate the coming of a new year with the people who mean the most to me out here...they too are my family. okay...i lied when i said i didn't get shit for christmas...actually, my dad gave me $200 to get insurance for my car, my grandpa gave me $50, my mother bought me some nifty lil gadgets (a hand vac and a digital pocket radio), my friend josh bought me two mini-bottles of goldschlager (eep!), and my uncle gave me all of his old fantasy and sci-fi art books (a real treasure!), and G cleaned my house (which is the awesomest present ever seeing as i could have never pulled it off by myself). so both material and ethereal, all is well in the world, despite all the car crap i'm having to go through and other such unsundary financial details. can't kill me right? so to all you out there...be happy with what you have...with who you love...with those that love you...and most of all, know that you have the power to make your life better despite what other people may tell you. live well, live hard, live happy when you can, and survive...so that the world may survive to tell your story...strive to make it a good one despite the hardship and sorrow... have a very happy new year! love from the strange lil cowboy in cali... ~B-) 2:49 p.m. - 2002-12-31 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
||||||
|
||||||