stardustcboy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ...Secrets... i don't like the fact that there are things i don't know. that there are things that are purposefully being hidden from me. it creates the greatest sense of unease. why? why would there be things that could not be shared? or are they? the dark side of my head starts working. spinning out all sorts of possibities as to WHY. but i realize that people NEED their secrets. they need them as much as they need to be alone sometimes. i think that is probably one of my shortcomings. that in relationships i invest TOO MUCH of my self. that i begin to believe that i should be able to share every little thought with that person and expect the same in return. but that is not so...and i find it rather naive and foolish of me. there are things that JUST CANNOT BE SAID...for whatever reason. even in the closest of relationships there are things that should not be shared. demons from the past that are best left in dark recesses to brood in silence. secrets that should never see the light, for if they did they would ruin everything. so be it. i want mine too, and i shall keep them. not here, but somewhere inaccessible to all save the darkest most hidden aspect of myself. baalgorgon is reborn. i write what i feel...but perhaps i hold back for fear that certain eyes may see? that there are certain truths that should not be spoken? i really have no other place to turn to save here in this digital space... i need a vent too. ~B-) 1:20 p.m. - 2002-12-13 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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