stardustcboy's Diaryland Diary

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...Rafting the Streams of Consciosness...

i awoke this morning...monday once again...the beginning of yet another slow plod to the weekend.

my alarm didn't go off...or if it did i was too dosed with melatonin to even take note...either way i don't remember hitting the snooze.

my eyes fluttered open and the red digital numbers on the clock read "11:51".

so i was late today...2 hours late. no big because we finished the prototype last week. all in all it looks really great so here's hoping something will come of it. now i'm just sittin' here at work. stressin' a little as to how i'm going to make ends meet for the next few months what with the whole car situation and lack of finances.

i find that when i stress i don't sleep. that's how i manage in times of duress, my mind just won't stop. strangely, my creativity soars.

i managed to work out things with robert and ihor (the two people involved in the accident last week). i'm incredibly thankful that i have good friends who are there in a pinch.

as it worked out, ihor wanted to call insurance and get them involved but robert was stalling to save my ass and avoid any litigation/court fines/repo that would fall upon me if the insurance companies discovered i was an uninsured driver. he pressed ihor (pronouned eyeore) to get an estimate and settle outside of insurance. ihor got a quote for the damages and the cost came to $647. he said he wanted it that day or he was making the call to his insurance company.

i didn't know what to do. i hadn't the cash and there wasn't any way for me to get it. you see, with my financial situation the usual options open to people who need quick dough are closed to me. loans/payday advances/credit cards, all of them are impossible for me to get due to my credit standing, and my parents aren't millionaires either so i can't make the call to mommy and daddy to save my ass. i told robert i would see what i could do, but that if push came to shove to just go through insurance and i'd take my licks. you make your bed you sleep in it, that's what i was taught. in the eyes of the law i'm the one at fault, and without insurance, i had no right to be on the road anyhow. i'm not the type to stand around and blame people/situations/things for my own poor decisions; so if the shit hit the fan, i was prepared to take full responsibility. oddly enough, robert bought me a bit more time with ihor and told me to get the money.

so i did. i called in on some favors and ended up paying him the following day at lunch. i thank the cosmos for bringing me such great people, people who look out for me, people who i can trust and turn to. my friend jake is a life saver, he fronted me the full amount of $647 and bailed me out. my friend rich also gave me $100 as well. to me these aren't piss-ant sums of money...and they have nothing but the greatest amount of respect and loyalty from me.

so i paid ihor off. sadly, the car robert was driving belonged to his girlfriend and the insurance is owned by her father. so in the end they still have to go through insurance; but if anything it is just them and not them AND ihor.

i haven't a clue as to how i'm going to afford paying for robert's repairs, or even begin to pay back jake and rich; but all of them are willing to let me pay it back in installments, so that's a good thing. but most importantly, i need to set the whole car thing straight and get it insured and registered. if i go to traffic school i can avoid most, if not all of the fine i owe, which will then leave me with just having to get insurance.

so all in all this whole thing could have turned out one helluva lot worse than it did, and it only makes me want to perform more senseless acts of beauty and random acts of kindness.

beyond all that, i'm incredibly excited to get home for christmas. it will be the first time i've been with all of my family together since over two years ago. it will be nice to see my mother and father together again after all the craziness over the summer (they were seperated for a while) and to see my blood brother (really my cousin) shea and his sister croi, who have been living over seas since i was 11. not only that, i will finally get to meet my little sister's fiance (that's right, he proposed to her three days ago). should be a good time and it will be a nice break from this shithole they call Los Angeles.

***

i noticed a few days back that my entries aren't being logged in my "older entries" link. it just shows the first two entries i made. what's up with that? has anyone else had this problem? aw well, just FYI for anyone reading this...DOES ANYONE READ THIS?...be sure to page back a few times when you read just to be sure you've caught all the recent entries (i tend to lead into each one)...also, be sure to check the profile and diary of SEADRAGON...for it is my old diary. you'll be able to see the transition. i wonder if i should go back into that diary and point people towards this new one? i had a few people reading that diary...more than this one.

i wish i had time to read more diaries on this site. people are so wonderfully fascinating and i'm so excited when i find that someone has made me a favorite. it's really the only time i get to see new diaries, for my browsing time is limited. also, i feel odd about reading diaries who don't list me...like it's an invasion or something...i know, i know they post it here so it's public; but i feel that by making me a favorite it's like an invitation to share that with me. all right i'm a little strange, so what?

anyway, this a rambling sort of entry today. rather random and pointless, but who said everything had to make sense or even have a point for that matter. i'll probably come back on later and do some serious self analysis...or not... ;-)

either way, you know i'll be back so never you worry...until then...

ciao

~B-)

1:57 p.m. - 2002-12-09

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